There's Something About You
by a0r123
Summary: Clare cannot stand Eli Goldsworthy but she knows there is somehow an attraction there. Will a new relationship blossom once Eli reads a love letter Clare wrote to him? Starts out like the show but there is an attempt at a different plot CHPTR5 is up! R
1. Chapter 1

There's Something About You

**Clare's POV**

I have no clue why there was an attraction. He was beyond normal in every single aspect. Elijah Goldsworthy drove me up walls and somehow found a way to get under my skin. But the voice in the back of my head implied that he enjoyed every minute of watching me squirm. Yet, still I felt a longing to be around him.

What am I saying? I make this sound like we're complete strangers. Well, we're not. Elijah Goldsworthy is not just my English partner, he's a… friend.

I was hooked by eleven words. Eleven words were all it took for my heart to melt. It skipped a beat when he pulverized my glasses with hearse, and it melted into goo when he told me I had pretty eyes. And I'm discovering that every little tease and each crooked grin he throws in my direction sets the melting point higher and higher. I'm praying now that once he realizes what those mixed signals do to me, he'll compliment the attraction, but wishes don't always come true.

I was sitting in the bright classroom, intoxicated by his scent which was wafting towards me every time Miss Dawes circulated through the rows. It was bitter sweet, his smell, but not in a bad way. I stared at his chocolate brown hair and saw it was lightly tousled. I hoped that if stared long enough he would turn around so I could see his face. His hair fell, perfectly, just in front of his eyes; those eyes. His emerald eyes were what kept me up at night. They had an eerie glow to them, but challenged me equally as his words.

"Prove it," They taunted.

He thought he could figure me out, rip me at my seams and uncover what I'm made of, but how could he figure out who I was, if I wasn't so clear myself? He seemed determined though, so with every chance he got he tried.

I fumbled impatiently with the flimsy floral fabric of my blouse as the lecture droned through my ears. "Letters have been part of our communication for centuries. Yes, there were ways to talk to distant acquaintances before texting, instant messages, and Facerange." A few laughs were heard but kept under Miss Dawes' radar, therefore she continued, "Important letters have been found all around the world to help piece together our history, but these facts are irrelevant to our new project." She retrieved a stack of newly printed papers from her desk and began to distribute them around the room. "Each of you will be writing a letter to someone in this class. It may be me, or the chum beside you, or even the peer you've been eyeing since day one," I felt her stare zero in on me, and only me. I quickly released the material of my shirt and felt chills run down my spine. Immediately engrossing myself into the imperfect doodles scratched in the margins of my handout. "The purpose of this is to get to know a distant student in this class, because my goal for you at the end of this semester is not only know more about yourself, but your peers too. This project will be handed in next week. I will inform you now that one copy will be handed to me, for a grade, and one will be handed to the person receiving the letter, any questions?" Her eyes scanned the room for a few moments. "No? Okay then, I'll give you sometime now to start brainstorming ideas." Pushing her glasses further on the bridge of her nose she then retreated to the sanctity of her beloved swivel chair.

Should feelings be expressed in a letter for English class? I think not, but my heart keeps telling me to take a chance.

_To: Eli Goldsworthy_

_Yea, it's me, Saint Clare. Yes, I'm writing this letter to you because if I ever talked to you about this I can just image you cracking a sarcastic remark. I don't want to deal with your antics at the moment, so here it goes: I like you, a lot, Eli._

Was I actually writing this?

I tore the sheet of loose leaf from my binder and sighed.

"So what can possibly be on the mind of the infamous Clare Edwards?" A voice chuckled. I glanced up at him now; a lopsided smile was plastered onto his face.

"Nothing that would interest you," I whispered, clenching the crumpled up paper tighter in my fist.

"Doesn't seem that way," He somehow abducted the paper from my grip.

"No!" I hissed and extended my empty hand towards the note that was now out of reach. "You don't want to read it; too many mistakes! Definitely something you do not want to read—" Eli held up his pointer finger, as if _that_ would silence me.

Once the letter was unfolded, Eli's cheesy grin was transformed into something I've never seen before. Was he honestly amazed? But his unfamiliar amazement didn't last; the note was not that long so he quickly finished reading it.

"This is very interesting, Clare." He noted before placing the scrap into his black jacket's pocket. "I might just have to get back to you about this." And with the sound of the pre-recorded class bell, he just got up and left.

Frustrated, I grasped my tote from the dusty floor and hurried after him. "Eli!" I shouted after his retreating silhouette. Though, instead of receiving an answer from Eli, someone tapped me on the shoulder. I furiously spun around to encounter an overwhelmed Adam.

"Whoa, mad Ginger!" He joked, raising his hands protectively.

"I'm not mad – at you; I'm mad at Eli." I mumbled.

"Why is that?" He asked.

"Well," I began, before walking beside Adam through the throngs of bustling high school students. "We had to write letters to someone in our English class. So I, idiotically, decided I would write my letter to Eli—"

"And in the letter, you told him you liked him?" He questioned.

"Exactly, wait, how did you know that?"

Adam smiled grimly, "Eli just _happened_ to mention it to me earlier. As in, five minutes ago."

"Really, did he say anything else?"

After learning about Adam's identity, I couldn't exactly look at him the same way without seeing Gracie. I completely accepted him, but now I saw him in a new light; a powerful light. It definitely took strength to live with something like that. Anyway, the smug grin wasn't detachable from Adam's slightly feminine features as he replied, "He also mentioned something about liking you back."

The gears in my brain began to turn, "Fascinating," Adam eyed me suspiciously.

"You okay, Clare?"

"Me?" I snapped out of my daze. "I'm fine. Though, do you have any idea where Eli was going?" I glanced towards the direction of where Eli's lanky shadow had disappeared minutes ago.

"I doubt he's in class." Adam rolled his eyes. "I heard him muttering about this park down the street third period. It's possible he could have gone there." The sound of the sixth period bell echoed throughout the empty hallway. "I better get to class, you coming?" Adam shifted the books under his arm.

"Nah, I think I'll take a day off." I smiled.

"Eli really has gotten to your brain." He sighed before heading down the deserted hallway.

"It's time to find the pretentious Elijah Goldsworthy." I mutter sarcastically under my breath. I dash towards the front lobby and push through the double glass doors.

**I will write more, on one condition: YOU READERS MUST REVIEW!**

**Thanks you :3**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hiya peoples! I updated again! In the same day! How are you gonna thank me? You guessed it! REVIEW! I enjoyed the feedback from the last chapter so I thought the next chapter was a must. so... yea... ENJOY!**

There's Something About You

**Clare's POV**

Crisp autumn air caused me to catch my breath once the clear double doors widened before me. It was already late September, but the trees still appeared to be captured in the summer season. I ran down the front steps and kept my gaze straight forward. I needed to look as if I knew what I was doing. Sophomores shouldn't be cutting class – scratch that – Clare Edwards shouldn't be cutting class.

Once I stepped off school property, I let out a sigh of relief. Eli would be beyond hysterics when he saw innocent, Saint Clare out on the town during school hours. I propelled my shoulders back and brought my pace to a brisk walk. Halfway there, I realized the park was further than I had remembered and stopped to sit on a bench outside The Dot.

Pleasant memories came back to me.

_Flashback:_

"_Scream, at the top of your lungs." He proposed. My eyes darted around me, hoping nobody was actually paying attention to our odd pair. I then propped myself on the edge of the bench. And well, I didn't exactly scream, per say. It sounded more like I was reacting to a child's version of a scary movie, which by the way is pathetic._

_Eli's brow raised and he scoffed, "Is that the best you can do?"_

_I then rose to my feet and actually screamed. A few bypassing strangers jumped at the sudden cacophony. Pleased, I turned back to Eli who was weakly smiling. "Okay, your turn." I said to him._

"_Yea, not my style," He stood and began to walk away._

"_What? No you have to!"_

"_It's not my style! No!"_

_We started to bicker playfully and I cornered him against the nearest telephone pole._

"_I need to…" I stopped and realized I was up against Eli, who was gripping my wrists. He let go slowly and I backed away. Okay, way too awkward. I stepped back even further, but curiously glanced at him. A smug, but attractive – dare I say sexy? – grin appeared on his face. I silently gulped and fell back down onto the bench._

My brain stopped spinning and noted the familiar surroundings. Things still appeared as they had in my head, except Eli wasn't beside me. I sighed and stood up to continue my search.

I think it was _at least _five miles; maybe more. Once arriving to the quiet park, I immediately noticed the foreign hearse stationary on the side of the parking lot. I smiled to myself and entered.

Everything looked so alive and bright even when fall was on its way. In a matter of weeks, the multiple shades of green would turn to golds, browns, and reds, which meant the trees were shedding their leaves for winter. Winter was a wonderful time, for the outside to freeze over _and_ klutzy people to slip on ice. Not that I was klutzy, I was just off-balance.

I finally spotted Eli perched on a ledge on the outskirts of the park. He was sipping from a Coca Cola bottle and staring up at the sky. I brought myself closer to him before speaking, "Daydreaming, Eli?" I giggled. He turned, but instead of catching sight of a surprised, smirking Eli, I noticed remorse on his mischievous features. But the negative emotion had miraculously vanished from his face when he saw it was me.

"So I don't personally care for this phrase but, oh my God. Clare Edwards skipped class to follow me? The world is coming to an end!" I weakly slapped his shoulder and laughed. His sarcasm was alive and well, alright. "Okay, so what brings you to this whimsical park? I'm guessing my good looks, which is obviously the real answer, unless this note tells otherwise." He extracted the wrinkled letter from his pocket and held it just past my nose.

"I want my note back!" I swiped at the dangling paper but his arm recoiled before I could grasp it. He only chuckled louder. "Eli!" I whined.

"Have I ever told you how adorable you are when you're angry?" He added slyly.

"I'm glad you think so in that pretty little head of yours because I might just be particularly mad today –" I, yet again, reached for the piece of paper unsuccessfully before rolling my eyes.

"I'm pretty? Wow this note must be accurate now. In the beginning, I thought this was some sort of scam, you know, but from the looks of it you really _are _into me!" He stuffed it back into his pocket and smirked. I could tell my face was red as a tomato. "Exactly, there it is again!" He joked; I giggled. His enthusiasm was contagious; was I actually laughing at my own embarrassment?

I put my bag down on the grass and sat beside him. "So, on a more serious note, why did you cut class?"

He took another sip from his Coke before placing it behind him. "What? It's now a sin to enjoy the outdoors?"

"No, I was just wondering why." I nervously tugged at the fabric of my shirt again.

There was a short period of silence, as if Eli was contemplating on what to say. I looked up at him to realize he was closer to me than before, much like the incident in front of The Dot last week. Only this time, there was no awkward feeling nagging at my brain. Can't he just close the unbearable gap already? I impatiently scooted closer to him, trying to focus more on the metallic guitar pick around his neck then the pair of lips coming closer to mine.

His lips contacted mine softly, as if Eli was scared of my reaction. Eli Goldsworthy was scared of kissing me? I felt as if I was on the tip of a diving board waiting to jump. Why not? So I dove into the unexpected kiss. I reached my arm to lightly grip his shoulder and my opposite hand to the side of his face.

Just so you know I have _never_ kissed a guy like this, ever! So my breath caught when he rested his hand on my waist. Beneath the kiss, Eli smirked at the fact my heart was restarting with his touch and long fingers were placed on my arm inches above my elbow. His rings we cool on my hot skin as the sudden embrace deepened.

An innocent kiss turned passionate, which led to a make out session. O Lord, how did this happen? That's right, the brainless mistake of writing a letter to Eli Goldsworthy. His tongue traced my lower lip and explored the rest of my mouth. Chills ran up and down my spine when the hand clutching my waist pulled me closer.

This kiss was like ecstasy and my cheeks had permanently been dyed a bright fuchsia. But when Eli finally pulled away my heart sank to the bottom of a bottomless abyss. He looked confused, and regretful. It seemed as though he never meant to kiss me.

"Shit," He muttered under his breath.

"What?" I asked.

"I'm sorry," He whispered and dashed away.

"Eli!" I called back.

He had retrieved the half empty coke bottle but the crumpled loose leaf still was left on the ledge. I carefully picked it up and slowly unfolded it at the worn out creases.

_To: Eli Goldsworthy_

_Yea, it's me, Saint Clare. Yes, I'm writing this letter to you because if I ever talked to you about this I can just image you cracking a sarcastic remark. I don't want to deal with your antics at the moment, so here it goes: I like you, a lot, Eli._

But underneath my familiar hand writing was a small amount of chicken scratch scribbled in black Sharpie:

xxx

**Haha =P I left you people with a cliff hanger! What are you gonna do now? Here's a hint: click the review button. It helps! I swear! But just to let you know, I probably won't update until the new Clare and Eli episode comes out… maybe a bit earlier if it leaks… anyway, hope you enjoyed it! And don't worry, more to come… later! :3**


	3. Chapter 3

**HAH! here it is! comments anyone? oh and dont forget to watch the new degrassi episodes! tomorrows gonna be epic! =D**

There's Something About You

**Clare's POV**

First, he drives me crazy with his crude sense of humor and excessive sarcasm. Then, he unexpectedly kisses me and just leaves me with no explanation. What next? He'll say he's the bad guy; we shouldn't be friends but call me his drug? Okay, that's taking the situation a tad too far… Although… I wouldn't mind a vampire at my doorstep in the next twenty-four hours.

I had stayed on the ledge in the park until I saw a familiar yellow bus chug past the iron gates. I put the letter in the pocket of my jeans and picked my bag off the ground. I trekked over the dew stained grass and left. The distance from the park to my house wasn't that long, but I returned home to find the remains of my family's latest Christmas card in the trash bin by the kitchen. The photo had been torn directly down the middle. On one side, half of me stayed with my mother while my other half sided with my father. We were ironically smiling, unaware of the damage our faces were now printed on. Darcy had already left for Kenya so she was literally out of the picture. The house was silent and both my parents' cars were missing from the driveway. _If_ things had gone better with Eli there was a small possibility that he would be accompanying me on the couch – Dear Lord! What has this boy done to me?

Entering my room, I planned on plugging in the headphones Eli had lent me; this was the plan until I remembered this afternoon. So instead of planting the bulky, wired, sound contraptions onto my head, they lay on the floor between my dresser and the door. I now sat in my dimly lit bedroom facing my powered laptop. Eli Goldsworthy had been online for an entire hour already, but he hadn't sent one instant message. Did I do something wrong? Am I a bad kisser? Oh goodness, did my breath taste bad? I quickly rose from the soft pillows on my bed and let out a deep breath into my cupped hands. I smelt the faint remains of Colgate toothpaste and Big Red cinnamon gum. It definitely was _not_ my breath. I sighed with frustration. Why won't he talk to me?

From the corner of my eye I saw the wrinkled paper sitting on my bare desk. It sat there by itself with only its shadow streaking across the tabletop for company. Feeling generous, I held the crumpled note.

_To: Eli Goldsworthy_

_Yea, it's me, Saint Clare. Yes, I'm writing this letter to you because if I ever talked to you about this I can just image you cracking a sarcastic remark. I don't want to deal with your antics at the moment, so here it goes: I like you, a lot, Eli._

Beneath my penmanship, was a quote written in black Sharpie; the same color Sharpie Eli's fingernails were.

_Truth is the most valuable thing we have, so I try to conserve it._

I had recognized the Mark Twain quote instantly, but why about the truth? I rubbed my temples vigorously; hoping my Advanced English 11 skills would be wash over my brain any minute now, but nothing came to mind. Eli wasn't trying to be blunt, at least not at this point in time. I noticed other things had been written at the bottom of the page, but they had been scribbled out.

My computer had no intention of granting my wishes. Ergo, with the flip of a switch I said goodnight to Facerange.

In the morning, my parents' existence was registered in my mind when I inhaled the scent of freshly brewed coffee. I opened my eyes to watch sunlight gracefully dance on my ceiling and awoke to the unexpected surprise of quieted bickering. Now, bickering wasn't the best way to start a morning, but it was better than unbearable screaming and worse, undivided silence. I rose from my bed and brushed through my auburn hair. Breakfast was fast and painless. Mom was running late this morning so she was incapable of giving me a ride, which forced my dad to talk to me during the ten minute trip to Degrassi. For the first time in weeks, I was able to ask him how work was progressing. Turns out, they were laying people off, hence the late working hours, and my dad was aspiring to land promotion. I left my father's car feeling the weight of numerous burdens lifted from my shoulders. However, when Eli passed by in his hearse I felt as if three million tons had crushed my gooey heart.

Before I could think, the words spilled from my mouth. "Can we talk?" I asked him. He forcefully slammed Morty's driver door closed and stalked off towards the front steps. Just when I thought a silence between my parents was insufferable, a tension between Eli and I was living hell. As the day trudged on, I felt incomplete without his reoccurring smirk and nauseating wisecrack.

Sitting on the cold tiles in front of my locker door with my head in my hands, I realized someone was beside me. I caught a glimpse of Adam, who was now crouched only a locker away. Since Eli had avoided me all day, Adam disappeared along with him. I noticed Adam's bright, plaid shirt and smiling face from the corner of my eye and sighed with envy. Was I really jealous of his happiness? Such a selfish thing to do…

"He wants to talk to you," Adam said quietly.

"Yeah right," I scoffed as an attempt to not care.

"He just doesn't know how." This confirmation made my head spin, but I chuckled with disbelief.

"Eli Goldsworthy cannot find an intricate scheme to repair our friendship?" I rolled my eyes and focused on the dull door handle across the hall. Beyond that door, a teacher was instructing loudly about enigmas. Eli is an enigma, one minute he is kissing me, and the next he's avoiding me.

"Yeah, well, every mad genius has a weakness." Adam stood and began to leave.

"Wait!" I shouted after him. I quickly leaped from my spot on the floor. "Why are you telling me this?" He stopped and looked at me.

"My two best friends are experiencing turmoil because they like each other. Can you see my dilemma?" He smirked.

"Adam that still doesn't answer the question." I said; placing my hands lightly on my hips.

"But I'm not the one with the answer." He pointed towards the doors, "He's outside, you know. Morty wouldn't start again so he needed to execute some handy work to get home." Adam winked at me before scramming.

I left my belongings behind, raced towards the lobby and spotted Eli in the deserted parking lot. Morty's engine was exposed and the mastermind himself was bent over the hearse. Without even realizing it, I was noticing other parts of him, besides his hair and emerald eyes. Oh Lord.

The mechanic lifted his face from the steaming gears to glance at me. There were no words coming from his mouth when he wiped his brow with a red rag. Adam was correct, Eli _was_ speechless.

"Why did you avoid me today? I know there is something between us, Eli. Adam even sees it." I crossed my arms across my chest.

"Well, I was wrong yesterday. I'm sorry I led you on." Eli replied with complete sincerity.

"Wow," I choked out.

**Huh? What did ya think? AND I even updated before wednesday! let's see, the perfect form of payment? REVIEWS! can u please click the review button? he's a little lonely... :3**


	4. Chapter 4

There's Something About You

**Clare's POV**

I wasn't giving up. He could avoid me and ignore my pleas for closure, but I wasn't losing him. Maybe the kiss was an accident; a mistake, not that I believed that for one minute. However, I would rather have Eli as a friend in my life than not at all.

So as part of my ploy, I cornered Adam after school, "Please help me, Adam." I whined.

"Hi Clare, nice to see you too," He rolled his eyes and slammed his locker door shut. "No, thanks," He held his precious Goon comic book close to his chest. Daring, I grabbed the book from his grasp. "Hey! That's a limited edition!"

"Well, it'll be even more limited if you don't help me." I dangled the book out of his reach, just as Eli had done to me the other day, which felt like eons ago.

"Fine," He muttered. "What do you want?" He attempted to grab his beloved book again, but I pulled away before he could place a firm grip on it.

"Where's Eli?" I asked.

"Home, probably. Are we really doing this again?" He reached for his book, but failed.

"Well, you said he wanted to talk to me. Our little talk turned into an unforgettable argument." I scoffed.

"What did he say?"

"He said he's sorry for leading me on,"

"That's bullshit." Adam spat.

"I know, so that means I need to figure out what's going on with him." I was pleased by Adam's response to our situation, but his face suddenly fell.

"Well, maybe it's not the best idea…" He muttered.

"What are you talking about? Yesterday it was quite clear you wanted this fixed." I watched as his brow furrowed and seemed burdened. It was like he knew the answer I coveted. "He told you to stay out of it, didn't he? Unbelievable." I shoved the book towards Adam and stalked off down the hall.

"Clare!" Adam shouted after me, but I only rolled my eyes and rounded the corner.

All hope was lost until I noticed a familiar vehicle. The black hearse was only leaving the crowded school parking lot. Adrenaline pulsed through me as I barreled down the concrete steps. I fumbled with the stubborn lock on my bike, but once it was free; I flew.

I kept my eyes on the death cab as I avoided elderly folks, small fluffy dogs, and apathetic tourists. Looking ahead, I sighted my target turning at the next light. My feet continued to furiously push down on the pedals. My breathing had become shallow, but I didn't mind. I couldn't lose him.

Morty dragged himself beside an unfamiliar residence just off the main road. Once Eli stepped out, my breathless heart skipped a beat. But while I was admiring, I lost control of the bike and smashed onto him.

"Eli!" I screamed as limbs flew and thin tires spun out of control.

He looked up for the slightest moment, portraying a glance of unawareness before I had pinned him to the ground. My helmet and head remained intact, but I was positive I had hurt him. He had attempted to remove the mail from the mailbox, now he was sprawled on the ground with a clumsy teenage girl on him.

"What are you doing here?" He spoke with annoyance in his voice, though he hadn't even tried to get me off him yet.

"Hi Clare, how are you? I'm fine, thanks for asking." I let a smirk pull at the corners of my mouth. My fingers fidgeted with the strap of my helmet.

"Hi." He added, coolly. For a moment, I hoped he forgot about whatever was bothering him. We continued to lie there without any conversation, until; of course, I had to open my mouth.

"So…" I mumbled. His lips formed into a rare smile. "How's the weather?"

"Clear, bright, and blue." I giggled at his retort.

"That would be correct, if you were talking about my eyes," I batted my eyelashes. I tried to not bring it up, but the conflict from earlier boiled under my skin. "But you don't like me remember? Why the flirting?" I removed myself from him on my own and stood.

"Clare," He sighed. I lent him an outstretched hand, but once he was balanced on his two feet I pulled from his grasp. His long fingers stubbornly tugged on my palm; unwilling to let go. "Just wait."

"Dr. Doom has a new identity, I see," I grimaced at him and tried extracting my hand again with no luck. "Hello Mr. Moody." He appeared taken aback.

"Mr. Moody? Is that the best you could come up with?" He joked and squeezed my hand.

With my other hand I unfastened the latch on my helmet and took it off my head. "I'm sorry, the mixed signals fogged up my vision."

"Mixed signals? When was I sending you those?" He still clutched my hand.

"This!" I groaned and waved our intertwined hands in front of his face. "These are mixed signals! I'm assuming in the ensuing minute, you'll ditch me again." His face fell, but he still held it tight. "Eli, if you're going to keep confusing me like this, I don't want to be friends with you anymore." Our previous moment had faded into the background, along with the numerous ones before it.

"If I asked you to take a ride with me, what would you say?" He looked at me with worry when no answer escaped my lips. He let my hand fall to my side and head towards his house. The numb static I fel seconds ago had vanished. I missed it; I would miss him.

"Sure, where to?" He stopped in his tracks and turned to smile at me. It was a genuine. No cocky smirk or devious grin washed over his features, just a pure smile.

**Wanna find out? Well you probably already know... though there may be a few twists in this storyline ;) REVIEW! pretty pretty please? with a cherry on top? :3**


	5. Chapter 5

**Clare's POV**

The hearse smelt just like him. Every cushion had his musky smell coating it, which made it impossible to stay mad at him. With each whiff, my brain bubbled up feelings of his touch. His hands pulling at my waist, his lips on mine, his knee prodding my own when we sat on that bench flooded my mind so much my heart started to ache. I called him Mr. Moody, when I should be the one accepting names.

Morty moved at a steady pace towards our unknown destination; a place I still have no intellect on. But suddenly we stopped. I turned to my right to peer out the window. A box-like, suburban home stood across the street. In the daylight it appeared dim and lifeless compared to its neighbors.

"Where are we?" I asked softly. I looked at Eli to see him emotionless. His jaw wasn't tight from rage, or slack by fear. He seemed relaxed, to an extent.

"This is my old house." He replied evenly.

"Oh," I whispered. I never actually knew why Eli had transferred to Degrassi in the first place. I only assumed a parents' job was relocated or something along those lines. I hadn't even considered what his past held. I could only feel happy that he was here.

"When I moved a couple months ago, I didn't just leave the house behind. I left my girlfriend and my friends behind too."

Of course friends would be left behind, but the word "girlfriend" caught me slightly off guard.

"I don't mean to pry, I have no right to, but what was she like?"

Eli's hands fell from the steering wheel to land limply in his lap. "No, it's okay. I want to tell you. The more of the truth I tell you, hopefully, the easier it will be to clear all these awful lies up."

_Truth_.

"The letter," I mumbled without even realizing it.

"Yeah, about that…" I reached my hand into my pocket and extracted the crumpled note. "There's a story behind that, you know." I enclosed the paper into my hand and waited for him to begin. My eyes trained intently on his face. "Last year, I dated this girl named Julia. She was…" He took a deep breath. "If you asked me about our relationship, I would call it casual. I liked her, she liked me, and so we dated." He twiddled his thumbs and fingered a particular silver banded ring. Petrified limbs entangled a smoky black stone. "We dated for a few months. A kiss here and there, a few movies nights back at my place, until…" He paused and dropped his hands. "Until, her friend started liking me. Her friend's name was Annabelle. She was amazing. She shared my love for music when Julia hated it; she had a thing for my hearse… I soon realized I liked her back. Julia had some issues with her stepmom, and her father thought a weekend away could resolve things." I started to get a feeling for where this was going. "When Julia, her father, and her stepmom left for the weekend I had some time to kill. Annabelle was free and we decided to sneak into the school for a little fun. You know, go up on the roof, and make a few prank calls from the main office." I gave him a skeptical look. He smirked. "She wasn't a saint. Her name was deceiving. Anyway, we had just made it back from the roof when we found this unlocked classroom. She asked if we could go inside. I obliged and followed her inside. It happened too quickly. Before I knew it I was on top of her swapping spit. She wanted it, I wanted it. Nothing seemed wrong but here was Julia, away for a measly weekend and here we are, her friends, making out behind her back." I swallowed hard. Well, that was a pleasant story. "We promised to never speak of it again, but Annabelle's mouth ran during one of the girl's sleepovers and out little secret was out. Julia hated me after that, she hated Annabelle after that. We had cheated on her. One month after Annabelle spilled the beans, word got around the school. Next thing I know, Julia is found dead in her bed one morning." Without even realizing it, my jaw had landed in my lap and I was clearly gaping at him.

"You couldn't have possibly been the reason…" I began, but he cut me off.

"I was. I might not have been the only cause but I was a dominant contributor. Some say she found out her stepmom was pregnant or something too. But I blame myself."

We sat in silence. Vehicles sped by down the street. I didn't know what to say. One girl was dead, another was alive, and here was Eli trying to protect me. God had this situation turned into the worst scenario possible.

"At her wake, her mother handed Annabelle and I each a sealed envelope. She let us know she had not opened it. I can still picture her tear stained face. It's heartbreaking, really. Inside the letter, Julia had wrote simple words, but each sentence had an utterly deep meaning. That was something I liked about Julia. While I was always wordy she was precise and always made a message clear with her words. In her letter, she said she loved me. But the rumors and harassment consumed her. In the chaos at school Julia became the girl who lost her boyfriend to her best friend." He let out a suppressed sigh. "Then you come along,"

I snapped back into focus. Me? What could possibly be said about me?

"After Julia's death, I can't find myself love because I don't deserve it. I like you, Clare. I really like you, more than I should." My breath hitched the back of my throat. "I'll understand if you don't what to be friends, I'll even sign one of those restraining orders…"

"Eli," I insist.

"…I didn't mean to lead you on." This silenced me. He had said those words again, but I now knew his reasoning.

Frustrated by his rambling I reached out and took his hands into mine. "Will you just listen to me?" I pleaded. He nodded. "I like you too. You read the letter, didn't you? You're not responsible for Julia's choice." He tried to cut in, "No, I don't think of you as a bad person; just misunderstood. You're only human. And the only human I seem to be falling for."

His stressed face softened into a smile.

"Do you think you could drive me home? My mom will wonder why I'm late for supper." With a small chuckle he turned the ignition, but not until he pecked me lightly on the lips.

**Sorry it's been taking so long to update! hope you liked it though. it took me a while to figure out a plot that didnt copy the show :/ got a few complaints about sticking too closely to the show storylines. but review! and there probably be only one more chapter.**


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